RUSSIA’S FUTURE: KINDERGARTEN APOCALYPSE

We learned this week that if President Putin one day faces the final battle, Russian preschoolers have his back. A report that a local TV station had fired a reporter in the Siberian city of Nizhnevartovsk generated a startling news item featuring a new song now being performed in some Russian schools by children as young as four. Our favorite lyrics include the following:

A hegemon has captured the global population

The European Union doesn’t have its own opinion

The Middle East is groaning from misfortune.

We won’t surrender the ridge to the samurai ever

Sevastopol and Crimea are ours, we’ll preserve them for our children

We will return Alaska to the harbor of the motherland.

There should be peace on earth, but

If the commander in chief 

Calls us to the last battle — Uncle Vova, we are with you.

“Uncle Vova” refers, of course, to Vladimir Putin. The sacked reporter, the mother of a child who performed this song in concert, was fired for publicizing the event in protest. See the creepy video here:

Bottom line: There are strident nationalists in every country on Earth, but its expression has become a bit more institutionalized in Russia. Here’s a kindergarten that teaches revanchist imperialism to kids still learning the alphabet and a TV station firing a reporter for revealing it to outsiders.

Footnote: The fired reporter also noted that her daughter was unable to pronounce the word “hegemon” and instead sang the Russian word for “hippopotamus.”

More from GZERO Media

A cargo ship is loading and unloading foreign trade containers at Qingdao Port in Qingdao City, Shandong Province, China on May 7, 2025.
Photo by CFOTO/Sipa USA

US Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent and Trade Representative Jamieson Greer will meet with their Chinese counterparts in Geneva on Saturday in a bid to ease escalating trade tensions that have led to punishing tariffs of up to 145%. Ahead of the meetings, Trump said that he expects tariffs to come down.

UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer speaks on the phone to US President Donald Trump at a car factory in the West Midlands, United Kingdom, on May 8, 2025.
Alberto Pezzali/Pool via REUTERS

UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer achieved what his Conservative predecessors couldn’t.

The newly elected Pope Leo XIV (r), US-American Robert Prevost, appears on the balcony of St. Peter's Basilica in the Vatican after the conclave.

On Thursday, Robert Francis Prevost was elected the 267th pope of the Roman Catholic Church, taking the name Pope Leo XIV and becoming the first American pontiff — defying widespread assumptions that a US candidate was a long shot.

US House Speaker Mike Johnson talks with reporters in the US Capitol on May 8, 2025.

Tom Williams/CQ Roll Call/Sipa USA

US House Speaker Mike Johnson is walking a tightrope on Medicaid — and wobbling.

US President Donald Trump and Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney meet in the Oval Office at the White House in Washington, D.C., USA, on May 6, 2025.
REUTERS/Leah Millis

The first official meeting between Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney and US President Donald Trump was friendlier than you might expect given the recent tensions in the relationship.